Popcorn, Please!

October 7, 2020

I have created not one, but two popcorn-loving monsters. This is my view while carrying a bowl of freshly-popped popcorn to my desk.

Murphy and Ollie looking upward
Murphy and Ollie, PLEADING for popcorn

Ollie’s vision is not good, but his nose knows exactly where the bowl is.

Because this is the Internet, I will post a disclaimer that they don’t eat a lot of popcorn, that I don’t put toppings on my popcorn, and that they have been eating popcorn for years without digestive distress.

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Covid-19 journal – October 2020

October 4, 2020

This isn’t a very fleshed out post, but I have to record that Donald Trump and a good number of influential Republicans have tested positive for Covid-19, just about a month out from the election. On one hand, it’s not surprising because they’ve spent months trying to downplay this mess as a bad flu. On the other hand, sweet merciful crap! Trump is the one guy who could have had a billion safeguards in place against getting it, and still.

We woke up at 3:30am Friday morning because Murphy was kicking around the bed, and I had to go to the bathroom, and then Ollie woke up and thought it was morning. WM took the dogs downstairs and I grabbed my phone to scroll through some Instagram photos to lull me back to sleep. I checked Twitter to see if the world was on fire (which in 2020 could literally be true) and saw the news that Trump and his wife tested positive.

(me, Friday morning)

It also says a lot about the state of our country that a non-insignificant number of people either think he’s lying about it or that he’s about to die and we’re not being told. The media can only report on what they’re told, and if they’re not being told accurate information, that leaves us all in the dark.

For the record, I don’t want him to die even though he’s the most boorish president we’ve had in my almost half-century here on earth. I don’t want ANYONE to die. I’m against the death penalty! I still feel guilty about the spotted lanternfly that I killed last week.

But I’m struggling to stay compassionate and sympathetic when my urge is to say “You, more than anyone else, deserve this. For mocking it, allowing the party that you presumably lead to call it a hoax, convincing Americans it would be over by Easter, saying it was like a flu when you knew it wasn’t a flu, and failing to model proper masking or social distancing practices. I hope your friend the MyPillow guy is there weighing in on treatment options.

Trying to be nice about it reminds me of trying to be nice to the girl who ripped the hat off of my head and tossed it onto the school roof when I was in 5th grade. I can only turn the other cheek once, and in for this specific dude that was in 2016.

It has been such a tumultuous year. I would say I want all of this drama to be over, but I’m afraid that’s already being granted to us by a cursed monkey’s paw that delivered a pandemic.

Right now, it’s like this.

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Fall Guys: Ultimate Knockout

October 2, 2020

In the latest news from your favorite menopausal gamer, I bought Fall Guys: Ultimate Knockout from the Steam store a little while ago and I’m hooked. Imagine Wipeout and Most Extreme Elimination Challenge as a videogame, played with 59 other people controlling bean-shaped characters and you’ll have Fall Guys.

Yes, I dressed my little bean like a Tiki Bird. I fell into a lot of slime in order to be able to afford the costume.

Each “show” is a series of elimination events. The events can be obstacle courses, team competitions, or even memory challenges. Make it to the end and you’ll get a crown. Crowns (and kudos, what you get just for playing) can be redeemed in their store for different outfits and emotes for your characters. I have two crowns because I won once and was given another crown as a bonus for leveling my character.

It is a LOT of fun, and very easy to jump in and out of at will. Because you’re actually playing against other people, there are going to be all different play styles, including griefing and cheating. Yes, some people will grab you to keep you from moving forward, or run into you and push you off the ledge or into an obstacle. Yes, some people have hacked into the game to give themselves extra speed or higher jumps. It is what it is. The best part is that there is no voice or text chat associated with the game so you don’t have to worry about trash talk. Plus, even if they are eliminated early on, your little bean is always happy with how they did.

UNLIKE ME. I can’t play for more than a few games at a time because I’m a very competitive person. I’m pushed on purpose I will push back because I’m old enough to be these players’ mother or grandmother and nobody’s the boss of me! (mutters about respecting gaming elders) There are two events (Fruit Chute and Slime Climb) that I haven’t beaten yet and it’s eating away at my soul.

Fall Guys is $19.99 on the Steam Store. I did not buy any of the extra addon packs, because I didn’t feel the need to spend extra money just for outfits and emotes. I’d say this is good for all ages, but would be frustrating for little kids with not-great fine motor skills.

I think it’s going to be a very video-game heavy fall/winter here at the House on Literary Lane.