*clears throat* Oh Christmas tree! Oh Christmas tree! Thy leaves are so unchanging! We bought you, tree, from QVC Thy leaves are so unchanging! We chose you from our comfy chair while shopping in our underwear, Oh Christmas tree! Oh Christmas tree! Delivered in a box, to me! Oh Christmas tree! Oh Christmas tree! Aluminum and plastic! Oh Christmas tree! Oh Christmas tree! Assembly is fantastic! You bring such joy from far and near And look the same from year to year Oh Christmas tree! Oh ...

Read More