A touristy weekend in Philadelphia

A few weeks ago (okay, over a month ago) some of our Seattle friends came to Philadelphia for a few days and we were lucky enough to be able to show them around.

Our first stop was the Museum of Illusion. This is one of those “museums” that cater to influencers. It was fun, but pricey for what was only an hour of entertainment. However, the Vortex Room was worth the entire price of admission for me.

We had some coffees at 3J’s cafe before heading to the Betsy Ross House. This museum was well worth the $10 per person. Real Betsy Ross was an upholsterer who got shit done while all three of her husbands died in various ways. Did she sew the (second) original US flag? Maybe? Maybe not. But she did sew flags throughout her career, including flags for the the US Navy and US garrisons.

Here is the room where it happened if you believe “it” is the sewing of the flag.

And this is detail from a fountain in her courtyard. It’s just a sweet cat rubbing up against the fountain. There is no evidence that Betsy Ross had a cat or even liked cats, but this is the type of speculative “Washington MAY have been here” history that’s rampant in the Philadelphia area. We just go along with it.

Of course, we had to visit the Liberty Bell. It’s always cool to see, but the most interesting part was a person in line with a mudpuppy in a two gallon water container. She was turned away (rightly, one could have wreaked havoc by tossing a container full of water and a panicked amphibian at a 270 year old relic) but why? Why are you touring Philadelphia on a hot day with a salamander in a plastic container?

We took a lovely photo though.

This mildly creepy mashup of the Phillie Phanatic and the Liberty Bell was at the Visitors Center.

We also went the Musuem of the American Revolution. It’s a great museum but I’ve been there quite a few times now and I think I’d be okay not going there again.

The final big highlight was Grim Philly Walking Tour. This was an after-dark tour that covered the more carnal side of the Founding Fathers and colonial Philadelphia. The tour guide was fantastic, the stories were fantastic, but we didn’t really see much at all. We spent two hours walking in a giant circle with three stops. It was supposed to be for ages 18 and up, but of course modern parents do whatever they want without consequence so some teens got to hear about whores and STDs.

And we swung by the Italian Market for some coffee and cannoli. We popped into some small shops and I bought some cheese from Di Bruno Bros.

Did we visit tourist traps? Yes, yes we did. But I believe that tourist traps aren’t intrinsically bad. If I tell you I went to Las Vegas, you’re not going to care so much if I only went to dive bars, but you want to know if I visited the Venetian (yes), the Bellagio fountain show (yes, but from across the street at Paris Las Vegas), or Fremont Street (maybe in 2025).

So when our friends came to Philadelphia, we knew we had to lean all the way in and take the cheesy (sometimes literally, see above) photos. My feet were wrecked and my face hurt from smiling, which is exactly how I like it, tourist traps or no.