Years ago, I was constantly sick. Colds, ear infections, croup, you name it, I had it. In Kindergarten, we had milk with our cookies for snacks. Milk always seemed to add to my congestion, so Mom used to send me into school with Pineapple juice on days I was sniffly.
Good Mom. (Happy Mother’s Day, by the way!)
Flash forward 800,000 years. For the last year, I cannot get enough pineapple in my life. Maybe it reminds me of tropical getaways. Maybe it reminds me of the soft halcyon days of my sniffly snuffly youth, but I need pineapple, dammit!
Wegmans, the grocery store I’d marry if it were legal, sells pre-cut fresh pineapple spears, rings, and chunks. It’s $3.99 for a squat little container of them. I happily gnawed them up. But I realized that fresh, whole pineapples are sold for $4.99 each. And then I remembered about a gadget I used to have at the house.
It’s a plastic thingy that cores a whole pineapple and slices it into rings at the same time, with minimal effort. QVC sells at set of two for $13.18, but really…one is fine. Wegmans sells them for $7.99 each. Here’s how it works:
- Slice the top off of a fresh pineapple.
- Place the gadget atop the sliced pineapple and begin to twist it. As you continue to twist, it will start boring into the pineapple and cutting rings. Do this over a bowl because the juices really flow.
- When you reach the bottom of the pineapple, pull the gadget straight up. You’ll have a continuous spiral of pineapple rings impaled on it.
- Laugh maniacally at how much you’re saving and how much more pineapple you have!
The black handle comes off of the top so that you can slide the rings off of it easily. The pineapple core is now in the middle of the gadget, and you can gouge that out easily with a knife. And the pineapple is completely hollowed out, so you can be a top-notch hostess and fill it with punch, melon balls, or sets of keys if you’re having that kind of party.
Or if you’re me, you chase the dog around with it and then throw it out.
PS: I didn’t lose my eyeball last night.
PPS: One straight WEEK of blogging!