America's Saddest Christmas Tree

November 28, 2006

On Black Friday, we went to Walgreens because we saw this in the circular for $19.99. It’s a 4.5 foot prelit tree. In order to purchase it, you had to take a ticket to the register.

The cashier spoke about 50% English. (a rant for another day). She rang up the rest of my purchase, which may or may not have included padded insoles but neglected to scan the ticket. I politely pointed out to her that the ticket was for the tree I wanted. She scanned the ticket, put it in the bag and finished the transaction.


I politely explained to her that although she had to scan the ticket, someone had to get my tree. She called for the manager. Manager 1 arrived, looked at my ticket with a panicked expression, and said, “You bought a tree?”

Yes, yes I did.

Manager 2 comes out. “Is that a tree purchase?” he bellowed.
“She bought a tree!” Manager 1 replied nervously.
“I can go get the tree,” he reassured her. “What tree?”
She skittishly scanned the ticket. “M!” she yelled.

Three minutes later I was in posession of a measly 2 1/2 foot cardboard box. Inside that, America’s Saddest Christmas Tree.

America's Saddest Christmas Tree

Yes, there is ONE ornament on the tree. I feel like I should decorate it with losing lottery tickets and pictures of Jimmy Carter.

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  • johnnyblack November 28, 2006 at 6:47 pm

    Jimmy Carter is the best ex-president we ever had.

  • Tommy November 28, 2006 at 8:02 pm

    I got to call a spade a spade. That is a sad Christmas tree.

    Hey, but with a little TLC and feminine touch, I bet that tree will Rock. It will have nothing on the Charlie Brown tree.

    Politics again :-)…(smile)

  • Kimberly November 28, 2006 at 10:10 pm

    lol…no politics, please! I only mentioned Carter because he’s associated with “malaise” (which I did not know wasn’t even mentioned in that speech!).

    I went to Target today and bought some ornaments…the tree should be looking better shortly.

    I hope.

  • AD November 29, 2006 at 1:00 pm

    The finished tree will look beautiful. Looks nice on the table.

  • johnnyblack November 29, 2006 at 4:29 pm

    The joke is that he is the best “ex-president”. That was a joke—HA HA HA!!!