June 16, 2004Things I have discovered in my first month of homeownership We use THAT much water? Pergo + feet in socks = fun! Too much exposure to yellow and blue plaid wallpaper causes homicidal tendencies Recycling, though beneficial, is a huge pain in the ass. Pergo + hyperactive small dog = more fun! Lawn envy does, in fact, exist. Letting a dog crap in another person’s garden and not cleaning it up is one of the basest forms of human behavior. Especially if it’s YOUR dog and MY garden. There are no shortage of home security companies willing to call me. Pergo + hyperactive small dog + tennis ball = tears of laughter. It takes a lot less energy to clean a large house weekly than a small apartment monthly Thirty years is a VERY long time.