This article is sending me because of the image of the CEO of Burger King casually chatting up people in an airport about Burger King.
I can’t imagine being approached by a CEO who wants to talk about fast food strategy while I’m minding my own business with a coffee. Okay, maybe I can…
Scene: Philadelphia International Airport. I’m drinking coffee.
CEO: Excuse me, would you mind sharing your favorite fast food joint with ne?
Me: Taco Bell. Hands down. No question.
CEO: Oh. Okay. I meant your favorite burger-based fast food pla-
Me: Wendy’s.
CEO: WENDY’S?
Me: I like me a square burger, Boss. And their fries are top notch.
CEO: Strange take. How about your favorite royalty-named burger-based fast food place?
Me: Uh, not sure. Does Dairy Queen sell burgers?
CEO: MALE PRIMOGENITURE!
Me: Oh! Burger King?
CEO: Yes, oh yes, Burger King.
Me: “I love a Whopper. I haven’t had one in years.” (actual line from the article)
CEO: ‘What are you waiting for?” (another actual line from the article)
Me: All of the stores near me closed, and the last time I went though a BK drive through, the manager looked like he was crying.
CEO: Oh.
Me: and the Whopper was squashed…
CEO: WE HAVE BOXES NOW!
Between this cringeworthy article and the video of the McDonald’s CEO gingerly trying their new Big Arch Burger, I’m beginning to worry about the emotional well-being of fast-food CEOs everywhere.
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