(Dedicated to the lovely men and women who come to Cooper River to race and who think nothing of exercising mere inches away from oncoming cars.)
(to the tune of “Silver Bells”)
See the sidewalks,
On the sidewalks,
Dressed in tight unitards!
At the street corner tensing their bottoms.
See them stretching,
Watch them lunging,
With their muscular thighs.
And at Cuthbert and Park all you’ll see…
Is Rower Buns.
Rowing time at Cooper River.
Shorts that cling,
Strut that thing!
While we’re stuck in traffic all day.